1
00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:56,000
(Phone rings)

2
00:02:08,309 --> 00:02:10,609
(Whistles)

3
00:02:10,710 --> 00:02:12,610
(Continues ringing)

4
00:02:15,313 --> 00:02:17,213
(Phone stops ringing)

5
00:02:18,415 --> 00:02:20,315
(Door bell rings)

6
00:02:25,419 --> 00:02:27,419
(Door bell continues ringing)

7
00:02:31,423 --> 00:02:35,123
(Man) l know you're in there, Bertie.
l can hear you whistling.

8
00:02:36,626 --> 00:02:38,726
(Clears throat) Who is that?

9
00:02:38,828 --> 00:02:41,528
- Who's that?
- lt's Jeeves.

10
00:02:41,629 --> 00:02:44,329
Oh, it's Cyril Fotheringay Phipps.

11
00:02:45,231 --> 00:02:47,931
- Barmy?
- Steady on, Jeeves.

12
00:02:49,334 --> 00:02:52,134
Come on in, quick. Come on. Come on.

13
00:02:56,638 --> 00:03:01,438
Most extraordinary thing. l was talking
to your man Jeeves a second ago.

14
00:03:01,541 --> 00:03:04,141
- No, no, it was me.
- He said he was Jeeves.

15
00:03:04,243 --> 00:03:06,443
lt was me.
l was pretending to be Jeeves.

16
00:03:06,545 --> 00:03:09,845
Oh, l see. Jolly good. Why?

17
00:03:09,947 --> 00:03:14,347
l don't want my Aunt Dahlia to know
l'm here. Had a set-to at her place.

18
00:03:14,449 --> 00:03:16,349
(Phone rings)

19
00:03:19,252 --> 00:03:21,852
- No, don't answer it.
- l wasn't going to.

20
00:03:21,954 --> 00:03:25,654
She'll be regretting it now. She'll beg me
to come back and sort things out.

21
00:03:28,158 --> 00:03:30,658
No, answer it. Pretend to be Jeeves.

22
00:03:30,759 --> 00:03:34,159
- How?
- Erm... Just sort of say you're Jeeves.

23
00:03:34,262 --> 00:03:36,062
Right.

24
00:03:41,566 --> 00:03:43,466
Mr Wooster's residence.

25
00:03:44,868 --> 00:03:47,168
Where is Mr Wooster?

26
00:03:47,270 --> 00:03:49,270
He's not at home, sir.

27
00:03:49,371 --> 00:03:51,871
l'm Jeeves.

28
00:03:51,972 --> 00:03:54,772
What do you mean you think not?

29
00:03:56,175 --> 00:03:58,475
Oh.

30
00:04:00,178 --> 00:04:02,278
- Well, who was it?
- Jeeves.

31
00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:07,880
- Oh. Where was he?
- Just round the corner.

32
00:04:07,982 --> 00:04:12,782
Ah, sent as an emissary, no doubt.
l'm sorry, but one can only do so much.

33
00:04:12,885 --> 00:04:15,985
- What's an emissary?
- lt's something that's sent.

34
00:04:16,087 --> 00:04:20,187
- What are you doing here anyway?
- Nothing. Just came over for a smoke.

35
00:04:20,290 --> 00:04:24,690
- Hope you don't mind.
- No. Smoke away, Barmy. Smoke away.

36
00:04:24,793 --> 00:04:26,693
(Kettle whistles)

37
00:04:31,897 --> 00:04:33,797
Oh!

38
00:04:42,604 --> 00:04:44,504
Phew.

39
00:04:48,407 --> 00:04:50,607
When you said you'd come for a smoke...

40
00:04:50,709 --> 00:04:54,709
l can't smoke at the Drones at
the moment. lt's Oofy Prosser, you see.

41
00:04:54,811 --> 00:04:58,511
We've got a bet on how long
we can go without smoking.

42
00:05:04,417 --> 00:05:06,917
- Morning, Jeeves.
- Mr Wooster.

43
00:05:07,019 --> 00:05:10,819
Morning, Jeeves.
l'm just making some tea.

44
00:05:10,921 --> 00:05:12,821
Really, sir? Perhaps l could...

45
00:05:12,922 --> 00:05:17,022
No, l may as well do it now. l've got
quite used to looking after myself.

46
00:05:17,125 --> 00:05:20,325
lt's surprising how much
one can assimilate in a day.

47
00:05:20,427 --> 00:05:23,827
Mmm. Now, Jeeves, it says here
it's best to use soft water,

48
00:05:23,929 --> 00:05:26,529
but after boiling,
it may again become hard.

49
00:05:26,631 --> 00:05:28,631
That's ice, isn't it?

50
00:05:28,732 --> 00:05:31,232
And it says here, that's right,

51
00:05:31,333 --> 00:05:33,933
''One teaspoon per person
and one for the pot.''

52
00:05:34,035 --> 00:05:36,335
Why does the pot get one?

53
00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:38,437
lf you'd allow me, sir.

54
00:05:42,540 --> 00:05:45,540
- Cup of tea, Barmy?
- Love one.

55
00:05:50,545 --> 00:05:53,145
- All right, Jeeves, get on with it.
- Sir?

56
00:05:53,247 --> 00:05:55,947
lt is obvious to
the meanest intelligence, Jeeves,

57
00:05:56,049 --> 00:05:58,949
that you have been dispatched here
by my Aunt Dahlia

58
00:05:59,051 --> 00:06:01,551
to plead with me
to come back to Brinkley.

59
00:06:01,652 --> 00:06:04,752
Same old emotional quagmire
down there, l suppose.

60
00:06:04,854 --> 00:06:07,854
Tuppy grinding his teeth, Angela aloof,

61
00:06:07,956 --> 00:06:10,856
Uncle Tom off his feed,
Madeline off her head

62
00:06:10,958 --> 00:06:13,958
and Fink-Nottle trembling at the thought
of the prize giving.

63
00:06:14,060 --> 00:06:17,560
l'm sorry, but Mrs Travers will have
to sort this thing out herself.

64
00:06:17,662 --> 00:06:23,162
Very good, sir. l was, in fact, sent to
persuade Monsieur Anatole to return, sir.

65
00:06:23,265 --> 00:06:26,265
- Anatole the cook, Jeeves?
- Yes, sir.

66
00:06:27,768 --> 00:06:33,167
Not to persuade me back to restore
peace and harmony to the inhabitants?

67
00:06:33,171 --> 00:06:35,471
Mrs Travers made no mention of it, sir.

68
00:06:36,974 --> 00:06:39,474
Well, of all the nerve, Jeeves.

69
00:06:39,575 --> 00:06:43,675
- This is what they call gratitude, is it?
- l really couldn't say, sir.

70
00:06:43,778 --> 00:06:48,878
l don't think l'm going too far, when l say
this just about takes the giddy biscuit.

71
00:06:48,981 --> 00:06:50,181
Very good, sir.

72
00:06:50,282 --> 00:06:54,682
l shall return to Brinkley and give the
whole bunch of them a good talking to,

73
00:06:54,785 --> 00:06:56,885
starting with that idiot Tuppy.

74
00:06:59,588 --> 00:07:02,088
lf you want a Turkish,
they're in the silver box.

75
00:07:02,189 --> 00:07:04,089
Oh, righto, Bertie.

76
00:07:04,191 --> 00:07:05,691
- Toodle-pip.
- Cheerio.

77
00:07:10,695 --> 00:07:13,195
- Ah.
- Ah.

78
00:07:13,296 --> 00:07:16,796
- You're not going out, are you?
- l am, Oofy. How can l help you?

79
00:07:16,898 --> 00:07:19,498
Well, l wanted to have a smoke.

80
00:07:19,600 --> 00:07:21,600
Say no more, Oofy.

81
00:07:21,701 --> 00:07:23,601
My house is your house.

82
00:07:23,703 --> 00:07:25,703
l've got this bet on with Barmy.

83
00:07:25,804 --> 00:07:27,704
There's no need to explain.

84
00:07:27,805 --> 00:07:30,905
lf you want a Turkish,
they're in the silver box.

85
00:07:34,709 --> 00:07:35,709
Ah!

86
00:07:46,617 --> 00:07:48,717
(Sloshes wine)

87
00:07:51,820 --> 00:07:55,720
- Am l not somebody, Mr Jeeves?
- Undoubtedly, Monsieur Anatole.

88
00:07:55,822 --> 00:07:59,322
Then why are they making against me
like bad peoples?

89
00:07:59,424 --> 00:08:01,724
Delicious veloute
aux fleurs de courgette.

90
00:08:01,826 --> 00:08:04,726
Monsieur Anatole himself
taught me to make it,

91
00:08:04,828 --> 00:08:07,328
when he first stayed at our little hotel.

92
00:08:07,429 --> 00:08:11,529
Ah, but Madam has got
the good of me many times over.

93
00:08:11,632 --> 00:08:13,932
A little more perhaps for Mr Jeeves.

94
00:08:16,335 --> 00:08:20,735
We have a duty to look after our ladies
and gentlemen, Monsieur Anatole.

95
00:08:20,838 --> 00:08:26,038
Look after? Am l the nursie?
Am l the the nursie for the kiddies?

96
00:08:26,141 --> 00:08:29,341
No, this is not kiddies. No, no, no, no, no.

97
00:08:29,443 --> 00:08:33,543
Kiddies is nice.
Kiddies is not stopping with eats.

98
00:08:33,645 --> 00:08:37,745
Kiddies is not saying to us chap,
''Puff, we not like you no more.

99
00:08:37,848 --> 00:08:40,848
''We not eat your combustibles.''

100
00:08:40,950 --> 00:08:45,750
Since time immemorial, Monsieur
Anatole, it has fallen to the Gallic races

101
00:08:45,853 --> 00:08:50,053
to bring civilisation to the rude
northerly provinces of their empire.

102
00:08:50,156 --> 00:08:55,456
Mmm. ls true. Anatole is civilian.
Anatole is nice.

103
00:08:55,559 --> 00:08:57,859
lt hasn't always been easy.

104
00:08:57,960 --> 00:09:00,560
Sometimes it has seemed
impossible, but...

105
00:09:03,364 --> 00:09:07,164
Up to the time she went to Cannes,
Angela loved me. You'll admit that.

106
00:09:07,266 --> 00:09:08,766
Oh, indisputably.

107
00:09:08,867 --> 00:09:13,367
But when she came back, she was just
looking for an excuse to get rid of me.

108
00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:16,470
Oh, no, no, no. What would she
want to get rid of you for?

109
00:09:16,572 --> 00:09:18,572
Obviously during those two months,

110
00:09:18,673 --> 00:09:22,773
she's transferred her affections to
some foul blister she's met out there.

111
00:09:22,876 --> 00:09:24,976
No, no, no, no.

112
00:09:25,077 --> 00:09:29,477
Well, l'll tell you one thing
and you can take this as official.

113
00:09:29,580 --> 00:09:32,180
lf ever l find
this slimy snake in the grass,

114
00:09:32,281 --> 00:09:36,281
l propose to take him by his beastly
neck, shake him till he froths

115
00:09:36,384 --> 00:09:39,484
and then pull him inside out
and make him swallow himself.

116
00:09:39,586 --> 00:09:41,386
All right?

117
00:09:41,487 --> 00:09:44,987
My dear Tuppy, during
those two months on the Riviera,

118
00:09:45,089 --> 00:09:49,589
it so happens that Angela and l
were practically inseparable.

119
00:09:50,693 --> 00:09:52,993
lf there had been
somebody nosing around,

120
00:09:53,094 --> 00:09:55,594
l should have spotted it in a second.

121
00:09:55,696 --> 00:09:57,796
l see.

122
00:09:57,897 --> 00:10:02,097
So...no mixed bathing
and moonlight strolls?

123
00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:06,300
No, no, no, no. Well, only with me.
lt was quite a joke at the hotel.

124
00:10:06,402 --> 00:10:09,002
But then l've always been
devoted to Angela.

125
00:10:09,104 --> 00:10:11,004
- Really?
- Oh, yes, yes.

126
00:10:11,105 --> 00:10:14,805
When we were kids,
she used to call me her little sweetheart.

127
00:10:24,714 --> 00:10:27,314
Ah, you're back.

128
00:10:27,415 --> 00:10:29,315
You're back.

129
00:10:29,417 --> 00:10:32,717
Welcome. Welcome, Monsieur Anatole.

130
00:10:32,819 --> 00:10:36,819
We have no more stuffing
with the eating, l think.

131
00:10:36,921 --> 00:10:39,421
l get my bagages.

132
00:10:39,523 --> 00:10:44,023
Jeeves, l can never
thank you sufficiently. Never.

133
00:10:44,126 --> 00:10:46,326
You've saved my husband's digestion.

134
00:10:46,427 --> 00:10:48,927
What ho, Aunt Dahlia!

135
00:10:49,029 --> 00:10:52,529
l didn't know that your master
was back, Jeeves.

136
00:10:52,631 --> 00:10:54,631
Has he no mercy?

137
00:10:59,335 --> 00:11:00,435
Jeeves...

138
00:11:00,536 --> 00:11:05,335
Suppose that you were strolling
through the illimitable jungle

139
00:11:05,339 --> 00:11:07,839
and you happened to meet a tiger cub.

140
00:11:07,940 --> 00:11:10,240
The contingency is a remote one, sir.

141
00:11:10,342 --> 00:11:13,042
- Never mind. Let's us suppose it.
- Very good, sir.

142
00:11:13,143 --> 00:11:16,243
Let us now suppose
that you biffed that tiger cub

143
00:11:16,345 --> 00:11:20,445
and let us further suppose that word
reached its mother that you'd done so.

144
00:11:20,548 --> 00:11:24,048
Now, what would you expect
the attitude of that mother to be?

145
00:11:24,150 --> 00:11:28,350
ln the circumstances, l should anticipate
a show of disapprobation, sir.

146
00:11:28,453 --> 00:11:30,753
Yes, very good, Jeeves. Very well put.

147
00:11:30,854 --> 00:11:36,054
Now let us suppose that recently
there'd been some little...coolness

148
00:11:36,158 --> 00:11:38,358
between the tiger cub and the tigress.

149
00:11:38,459 --> 00:11:42,259
l don't know, for a day or two, perhaps,
they'd not been on speaking terms.

150
00:11:42,361 --> 00:11:44,961
Now, would this make
any difference to the vim

151
00:11:45,063 --> 00:11:47,563
with which the latter leaps
to the former's aid?

152
00:11:47,665 --> 00:11:51,865
- No, sir.
- Well, here, then, in brief, is my plan.

153
00:11:51,967 --> 00:11:55,467
l will draw my cousin Angela
to one side to a secluded spot

154
00:11:55,570 --> 00:11:57,770
and l shall roast Tuppy properly.

155
00:11:57,871 --> 00:11:59,771
Roast, sir?

156
00:11:59,872 --> 00:12:03,172
Erm... Disparage, knock,
decry, denounce.

157
00:12:03,274 --> 00:12:05,174
l shall be very terse about Tuppy,

158
00:12:05,275 --> 00:12:08,775
giving it, as my opinion,
that in all the essentials,

159
00:12:08,878 --> 00:12:15,278
he is more akin to a warthog,
than an ex-member of a fine old school.

160
00:12:15,382 --> 00:12:18,482
- And what will ensue?
- What, indeed, sir?

161
00:12:18,584 --> 00:12:22,284
Er, no, Jeeves. That was
one of those erm...whatsit questions.

162
00:12:22,386 --> 00:12:24,386
- Rhetorical, sir?
- Right, yes.

163
00:12:24,487 --> 00:12:27,987
Now, hearing him attacked,
my cousin Angela's heart will become

164
00:12:28,089 --> 00:12:31,589
as sick as mud,
the maternal tigress in her will awaken.

165
00:12:31,692 --> 00:12:33,892
No matter what differences they've had,

166
00:12:33,993 --> 00:12:37,793
she will remember that he is the man
she loves and leap to his defence.

167
00:12:37,896 --> 00:12:40,996
From there to falling
into his arms is but a step.

168
00:12:41,097 --> 00:12:43,197
So how do you react to that, Jeeves?

169
00:12:43,299 --> 00:12:45,499
The idea is an ingenious one, sir.

170
00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:48,500
Well, we Woosters are ingenious,
noted for it.

171
00:12:48,602 --> 00:12:52,402
lf one things gives us the pip,
it's two loving hearts being estranged.

172
00:12:52,504 --> 00:12:54,504
l can readily appreciate it, sir.

173
00:12:54,606 --> 00:12:58,906
l'm not speaking about knowledge
of the form book. l've tested this theory.

174
00:12:59,008 --> 00:13:01,208
- lndeed, sir?
- Mmm. Oh, yes.

175
00:13:01,310 --> 00:13:03,410
And it works.

176
00:13:03,511 --> 00:13:08,511
l was standing on Eden Rock in Antibes
last month and a girl l know slightly

177
00:13:08,614 --> 00:13:11,314
pointed to this fellow
diving into the water

178
00:13:11,416 --> 00:13:14,516
and asked me if l didn't think
that his legs were about

179
00:13:14,618 --> 00:13:18,418
the silliest looking pair of props
ever issued to a human being.

180
00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:23,520
Well, l agreed that indeed they were
and for, perhaps, a couple of minutes,

181
00:13:23,624 --> 00:13:29,624
l was extraordinarily witty and satirical
about this bird's underpinnings.

182
00:13:29,727 --> 00:13:31,627
And guess what happened next?

183
00:13:31,729 --> 00:13:33,929
l am agog to learn, sir.

184
00:13:34,030 --> 00:13:38,430
A cyclone is what happened next,
Jeeves, emanating from this girl.

185
00:13:38,533 --> 00:13:42,733
She started on my own legs, saying that
they weren't much to write home about

186
00:13:42,835 --> 00:13:46,635
and then she moved on
to dissect my manners, morals,

187
00:13:46,738 --> 00:13:51,238
intellect, general physique
and method of eating asparagus.

188
00:13:51,341 --> 00:13:55,241
By the time she'd finished, the best that
could be said about poor old Bertram

189
00:13:55,343 --> 00:13:59,343
was that so far as was known, he hadn't
actually burnt down an orphanage.

190
00:13:59,446 --> 00:14:01,646
A most illuminating story, sir.

191
00:14:02,648 --> 00:14:04,648
No, no, no, Jeeves, Jeeves.

192
00:14:04,749 --> 00:14:06,649
You haven't had the pay-off yet.

193
00:14:06,750 --> 00:14:10,850
Oh, l'm so sorry, sir. The structure
of your tale deceived me

194
00:14:10,953 --> 00:14:13,253
for a moment into thinking
that it was over.

195
00:14:13,354 --> 00:14:18,354
No, no, the point is that she was actually
engaged to this fellow with the legs.

196
00:14:18,457 --> 00:14:20,757
They'd had a disagreement
the night before,

197
00:14:20,859 --> 00:14:24,559
but there they were, the following night,
their differences made up

198
00:14:24,661 --> 00:14:27,161
and the love light
once more in their eyes.

199
00:14:27,263 --> 00:14:30,363
l expect much the same results
with my cousin Angela.

200
00:14:30,465 --> 00:14:34,265
l look forward to it
with lively anticipation, sir.

201
00:14:39,270 --> 00:14:42,870
- Care for a saunter, Angela, old girl?
- Love to, Bertie, darling.

202
00:14:42,972 --> 00:14:44,272
Goodo.

203
00:14:44,373 --> 00:14:45,873
Shh.

204
00:14:45,974 --> 00:14:48,974
Tom's listening to the news.

205
00:14:50,777 --> 00:14:53,877
l have much to say
that's not for the public ear.

206
00:15:00,683 --> 00:15:04,783
Bertie, darling, this grass is awfully wet.
lt'll ruin my shoes.

207
00:15:04,886 --> 00:15:07,186
- Put your feet on my lap.
- All right.

208
00:15:07,287 --> 00:15:10,687
- You can tickle my ankles.
- Right.

209
00:15:10,789 --> 00:15:13,989
Now, Angela,
what about you and Tuppy?

210
00:15:14,091 --> 00:15:16,891
ls it true the wedding bells
are not going to ring out?

211
00:15:16,993 --> 00:15:19,193
- Yes.
- Definitely over, eh?

212
00:15:19,295 --> 00:15:21,395
Definitely.

213
00:15:21,496 --> 00:15:24,696
Well, if you want my opinion,
it's a bit of goose for you.

214
00:15:24,798 --> 00:15:27,098
lt's a mystery
how you stood him for so long.

215
00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:30,200
ls that an animal in the bush
over there, Bertie?

216
00:15:31,102 --> 00:15:33,902
- lt sort of rustled.
- lt's probably a weasel.

217
00:15:34,004 --> 00:15:38,803
Taken all in all, this Glossop ranks very
low down among the wines and spirits.

218
00:15:38,807 --> 00:15:41,607
- Frightful oik.
- l always thought you were friends.

219
00:15:41,708 --> 00:15:45,808
What, friends... No, no, no, no, no.
Absolutely not. No.

220
00:15:45,911 --> 00:15:49,011
One was civil, of course,
but in addition to looking like

221
00:15:49,113 --> 00:15:51,413
a thing that comes out of hollow trees,

222
00:15:51,514 --> 00:15:55,814
he's universally acknowledged
to be a dumb brick of the first water.

223
00:15:55,917 --> 00:15:58,517
No soul, no conversation, nothing.

224
00:15:58,619 --> 00:16:02,119
- Yes. Yes, you're quite right.
- Eh?

225
00:16:02,221 --> 00:16:06,121
lt's so nice to talk to someone who takes
a sensible view about this Glossop.

226
00:16:06,824 --> 00:16:09,424
- Well, l...
- He's conceited and opinionated.

227
00:16:09,526 --> 00:16:13,826
He drinks too much, eats too much and
l don't much like the colour of his hair.

228
00:16:16,130 --> 00:16:17,930
l'm going in.

229
00:16:19,532 --> 00:16:22,432
- Er...
- Goodbye, Bertie.

230
00:16:24,134 --> 00:16:26,034
So!

231
00:16:26,136 --> 00:16:29,236
- Ah, Tuppy, old chap.
- So!

232
00:16:29,338 --> 00:16:31,638
- Been here long?
- Long enough.

233
00:16:31,739 --> 00:16:35,039
l'm going to kick your spine up
through the top of your head.

234
00:16:35,141 --> 00:16:39,841
Ah, yes, erm...l think l know
what's on your mind, Tuppy.

235
00:16:39,944 --> 00:16:44,044
lf you were in those bushes, during the
conversation with the recent Angela...

236
00:16:44,147 --> 00:16:46,447
- l was.
- You were. You were. Right, good.

237
00:16:46,548 --> 00:16:49,848
We won't go into the ethics of it.
Eavesdropping people call it.

238
00:16:49,950 --> 00:16:52,550
- A bit un-English, you must admit.
- l'm Scots.

239
00:16:52,652 --> 00:16:55,352
- Really? l didn't know that.
- l'm going to get you.

240
00:16:55,454 --> 00:16:59,054
- Now, look, Tuppy, it was a plan.
- What are you talking about?

241
00:16:59,156 --> 00:17:03,156
Well...if it wasn't a plan,
why did l knock you to Angela?

242
00:17:03,259 --> 00:17:06,559
- Because you're in love with her.
- l rest my case.

243
00:17:07,561 --> 00:17:10,861
- What? No!
- Someone stole her from me in Cannes.

244
00:17:10,963 --> 00:17:15,063
You told me she was with you all the
time and hardly spoke to anybody else.

245
00:17:15,166 --> 00:17:19,866
Now, Tuppy, look here, you've got
this all wrong and l can prove it.

246
00:17:19,969 --> 00:17:23,969
During that sojourn in Cannes,
my affections were engaged elsewhere.

247
00:17:24,071 --> 00:17:27,171
- What?
- My affections engaged elsewhere.

248
00:17:27,273 --> 00:17:28,773
Well, who was she?

249
00:17:28,874 --> 00:17:31,374
My dear Tuppy, does one
bandy a woman's name?

250
00:17:31,476 --> 00:17:33,876
lf one doesn't want one's head pulled off.

251
00:17:33,977 --> 00:17:37,477
Yes, right.
Well, obviously this is a special case.

252
00:17:37,580 --> 00:17:39,480
Madeline Bassett.

253
00:17:39,581 --> 00:17:42,881
You're in love with
that weird gawd-help-us Bassett.

254
00:17:42,983 --> 00:17:47,483
Well, l don't think you should call her
a weird gawd-help-us, Tuppy.

255
00:17:47,586 --> 00:17:49,486
Odd in some of her views perhaps.

256
00:17:49,587 --> 00:17:53,587
One does not see eye-to-eye with her
on the matter of stars and bunny rabbits,

257
00:17:53,689 --> 00:17:55,589
but not a weird gawd-help-us.

258
00:17:55,691 --> 00:17:59,291
And you stick to it
that you're in love with her?

259
00:17:59,393 --> 00:18:02,493
lt is not 24 hours
since she turned me down.

260
00:18:02,595 --> 00:18:06,095
- Turned you down?
- Like a bedspread. ln this very garden.

261
00:18:06,197 --> 00:18:10,997
So you see l can't be the chap, if any,
who stole Angela from you in Cannes.

262
00:18:11,100 --> 00:18:13,600
Cos your affections
were engaged elsewhere?

263
00:18:13,702 --> 00:18:15,802
During that sojourn.

264
00:18:15,903 --> 00:18:18,103
Oh, l see.

265
00:18:18,205 --> 00:18:22,605
All right, then.
Sorry to have troubled you.

266
00:18:35,115 --> 00:18:39,215
lt wasn't just you.
What about the things Angela said?

267
00:18:39,318 --> 00:18:42,518
Oh, well, she obviously spotted you
in those bushes

268
00:18:42,620 --> 00:18:44,720
and was just talking to score off you.

269
00:18:44,821 --> 00:18:48,921
She adores you, Tuppy.
She worships the ground you tread on...

270
00:18:49,023 --> 00:18:55,523
Bertie, if you should see Mr Glossop,
perhaps you would give him these.

271
00:18:55,628 --> 00:18:59,128
lt's nearly six o'clock
and he hasn't eaten a morsel since tea.

272
00:18:59,230 --> 00:19:01,930
Oh, l know. l'll put them down here.

273
00:19:02,031 --> 00:19:04,131
They'll be easier for him to reach.

274
00:19:06,434 --> 00:19:09,534
lt's like leaving food out
for a little animal.

275
00:19:14,439 --> 00:19:16,439
Er...Angela!

276
00:19:20,843 --> 00:19:23,343
How still and peaceful everything is.

277
00:19:39,855 --> 00:19:42,955
Jeeves, l have decided
that Tuppy and Miss Angela

278
00:19:43,057 --> 00:19:45,357
will have to disentangle their own affairs.

279
00:19:45,458 --> 00:19:47,458
Today is the day for finally clearing up

280
00:19:47,559 --> 00:19:49,859
the whole Gussie-Miss Bassett
imbroglio.

281
00:19:49,961 --> 00:19:51,261
lndeed, sir.

282
00:19:51,362 --> 00:19:55,362
Where we've been falling down is in not
keeping it to the forefront of our minds

283
00:19:55,464 --> 00:19:58,164
that in Gussie Fink-Nottle,
we are dealing with a poop.

284
00:19:58,266 --> 00:20:02,066
A sensitive plant might perhaps be
a kinder description, sir.

285
00:20:02,168 --> 00:20:06,968
A poop, Jeeves. And a poop who drinks
nothing stronger than orange juice.

286
00:20:07,071 --> 00:20:11,570
- l was not aware of that, sir.
- Oh, yes. l've had it from his own lips.

287
00:20:11,574 --> 00:20:16,074
Whether from some hereditary taint,
or he promised his mother he wouldn't,

288
00:20:16,177 --> 00:20:20,077
Gussie Fink-Nottle's never pushed so
much as a gin and tonic over the larynx.

289
00:20:20,179 --> 00:20:24,779
And he expects, this poop expects,
Jeeves, under these conditions,

290
00:20:24,882 --> 00:20:27,482
to propose marriage to the girl he loves.

291
00:20:27,584 --> 00:20:31,284
l mean...one hardly knows
whether to smile or weep, what?

292
00:20:31,386 --> 00:20:34,886
You consider total abstinence
to be a handicap

293
00:20:34,989 --> 00:20:37,889
in a gentleman wishing to make
a proposal of marriage?

294
00:20:37,990 --> 00:20:40,090
Dash it, Jeeves. Use your intelligence.

295
00:20:40,192 --> 00:20:44,192
Were it not for the grape and the grain,
weddings would be a thing of the past.

296
00:20:44,294 --> 00:20:46,394
Proposals but a dim memory.

297
00:20:46,496 --> 00:20:48,996
Without it, Jeeves, we'd babble.

298
00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:55,200
Thank you, Jeeves.

299
00:20:56,402 --> 00:21:01,202
Only active measures promptly applied
can prevent this poor poop Fink-Nottle

300
00:21:01,305 --> 00:21:03,505
from babbling about newts again.

301
00:21:03,606 --> 00:21:07,606
Which is why l intend
to secure a bottle of gin

302
00:21:07,709 --> 00:21:10,609
and lace his luncheon
orange juice with it.

303
00:21:10,711 --> 00:21:12,611
Sir?

304
00:21:12,712 --> 00:21:15,812
l can't imagine why you ''sir'' Jeeves?

305
00:21:15,914 --> 00:21:19,314
The plan l've put forward seems
to me to be icily logical.

306
00:21:19,416 --> 00:21:21,916
l fail to see why
it should attract any ''sirring''.

307
00:21:22,017 --> 00:21:24,017
No, sir?

308
00:21:26,320 --> 00:21:28,920
Let us hear your objections,
then, Jeeves.

309
00:21:29,022 --> 00:21:32,522
A certain amount of risk
is inherent in your stratagem, sir.

310
00:21:32,624 --> 00:21:35,924
lt is not always a simple matter
to gauge the effect of alcohol

311
00:21:36,026 --> 00:21:39,126
on a subject previously
unexposed to such stimulants.

312
00:21:39,228 --> 00:21:42,728
lt can have distressing results
in the case of parrots.

313
00:21:42,830 --> 00:21:44,930
- Parrots?
- l'm thinking of an incident

314
00:21:45,032 --> 00:21:49,132
when l was in the service of the late
Lord Brancaster, who owned a parrot.

315
00:21:49,234 --> 00:21:52,534
One day it happened
that the bird was lethargic, sir,

316
00:21:52,636 --> 00:21:57,136
and His Lordship offered it a portion
of seedcake steeped in the '84 port.

317
00:21:57,239 --> 00:21:58,539
Oh, good egg.

318
00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:03,440
The bird bit His Lordship on his thumb
and sang part of a sea shanty.

319
00:22:03,543 --> 00:22:06,543
lt then fell to the bottom of its cage
and remained there

320
00:22:06,645 --> 00:22:11,345
for some considerable period of time
with its legs in the air, unable to move.

321
00:22:11,448 --> 00:22:15,148
- l merely mention this, sir.
- There's a flaw here, Jeeves.

322
00:22:15,250 --> 00:22:17,350
- Do you know what it is?
- No, sir.

323
00:22:18,252 --> 00:22:22,152
- Gussie isn't a parrot.
- True, sir, but...

324
00:22:22,254 --> 00:22:24,954
No more discussion, Jeeves.
He's a poop.

325
00:22:25,056 --> 00:22:26,956
Very good, sir.

326
00:22:33,061 --> 00:22:37,161
You noticed l said l was going to put
this project through today, Jeeves?

327
00:22:37,264 --> 00:22:39,164
Why do you think l said today?

328
00:22:39,265 --> 00:22:42,065
You feel that if it 'twere done
when 'tis done,

329
00:22:42,167 --> 00:22:44,667
then 'twere well it were done quickly, sir?

330
00:22:44,768 --> 00:22:46,368
Partly, Jeeves, yes, partly.

331
00:22:46,469 --> 00:22:49,969
But the chief reason is that today
is the day of the prize giving

332
00:22:50,072 --> 00:22:51,972
at Market Snodsbury Grammar School.

333
00:22:52,073 --> 00:22:55,673
We shall, by lacing the juice, embolden
him to propose to Miss Bassett,

334
00:22:55,775 --> 00:23:00,275
and also put him so into shape that
he will hold that audience spellbound.

335
00:23:00,378 --> 00:23:02,278
l see, sir.

336
00:24:07,419 --> 00:24:10,219
Ah, Jeeves. Thank you.

337
00:24:28,532 --> 00:24:30,632
Seems to be happy enough.

338
00:24:30,733 --> 00:24:35,233
lndeed, sir. The engagement appears
to have lifted his spirits considerably.

339
00:24:35,336 --> 00:24:36,636
Engagement?

340
00:24:36,737 --> 00:24:38,637
You're not aware that Mr Fink-Nottle

341
00:24:38,738 --> 00:24:42,038
proposed to Miss Bassett
this afternoon and was accepted, sir?

342
00:24:42,140 --> 00:24:45,839
Well, well, well, Jeeves.
You see how right l was.

343
00:24:45,843 --> 00:24:47,143
lndeed, sir.

344
00:24:47,244 --> 00:24:52,044
This must be an eye-opener for you,
watch me handling this case.

345
00:24:52,147 --> 00:24:55,747
Luckily, sir, l found an opportunity
to add half a bottle of spirits

346
00:24:55,849 --> 00:24:57,649
to his luncheon orange juice.

347
00:24:58,751 --> 00:25:00,651
Oh, Jeeves.

348
00:25:00,752 --> 00:25:02,552
So did l, Jeeves.

349
00:25:02,653 --> 00:25:05,353
Now, this year,
we are all delighted to welcome,

350
00:25:05,455 --> 00:25:08,955
as our guest for the afternoon,
Mr Fitz Wottle.

351
00:25:09,057 --> 00:25:10,657
Fink-Nottle!

352
00:25:10,758 --> 00:25:12,158
(Laughter)

353
00:25:12,259 --> 00:25:14,559
l should say Fink-Nottle.

354
00:25:14,660 --> 00:25:17,060
Well, of course you should, you silly ass.

355
00:25:17,162 --> 00:25:19,962
- (Laughter)
- All right, get on with it.

356
00:25:20,964 --> 00:25:25,964
We are all happy, as l say,
to welcome Mr Fink-Nottle,

357
00:25:26,067 --> 00:25:28,667
who has kindly consented
to present the prizes.

358
00:25:28,769 --> 00:25:32,869
Now, l'm sure Mr Fink-Nottle's name
is familiar to us all.

359
00:25:32,972 --> 00:25:37,872
(Gussie) Not to you!
You didn't seem to know it.

360
00:25:37,975 --> 00:25:40,375
(Laughter)

361
00:25:42,678 --> 00:25:45,178
Righto, push off.

362
00:25:46,080 --> 00:25:48,080
Speech.

363
00:25:49,081 --> 00:25:52,881
- Speech?
- (Cheering)

364
00:25:52,984 --> 00:25:58,284
Boys... l mean,
ladies and gentlemen and boys.

365
00:26:02,190 --> 00:26:05,790
lt's a beautiful world, boys and girls,

366
00:26:05,892 --> 00:26:09,792
ladies and gentlemen,
Lords and...things.

367
00:26:09,894 --> 00:26:12,394
l mean, the sky is blue.

368
00:26:12,496 --> 00:26:14,496
The birds are singing.

369
00:26:14,597 --> 00:26:16,697
There's optimism everywhere.

370
00:26:16,799 --> 00:26:19,299
And why not, girls and ladies?

371
00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:24,600
l should like you all to be upstanding and
give three cheers for this beautiful world.

372
00:26:24,703 --> 00:26:28,703
- Up you get. Hip, hip!
- Hurray!

373
00:26:28,806 --> 00:26:31,306
- Hip, hip!
- Hurray!

374
00:26:31,808 --> 00:26:34,508
- Hip, hip!
- Hurray!

375
00:26:34,609 --> 00:26:36,909
All right, sit down, sit down.

376
00:26:37,011 --> 00:26:40,311
Now, anybody who says
this isn't a beautiful world

377
00:26:40,413 --> 00:26:43,013
doesn't know what they're talking about.

378
00:26:43,115 --> 00:26:49,415
You see, if there's one thing in
the world l can't stand, it's a pessimist.

379
00:26:49,519 --> 00:26:52,619
You see, a pessimist is a man who...

380
00:26:53,721 --> 00:26:56,221
Why, hello, Bertie.

381
00:26:57,123 --> 00:26:59,223
l didn't know you were here.

382
00:26:59,325 --> 00:27:01,625
Now, there's an instance of what l mean.

383
00:27:01,726 --> 00:27:04,026
Erm, ladies and whatsits,

384
00:27:04,128 --> 00:27:07,728
take a good look at that object
sitting there at the back,

385
00:27:07,830 --> 00:27:11,530
morning coat, trousers as worn, rose
in buttonhole, you can't miss him.

386
00:27:12,533 --> 00:27:15,933
l despise that man, women and children.

387
00:27:16,035 --> 00:27:19,835
And shall l tell you why? Yes?
Because he's a...

388
00:27:19,937 --> 00:27:26,337
l think, Mr Fink-Nottle, as time is getting
on, we ought to commence the prizes.

389
00:27:26,441 --> 00:27:29,041
Oh, it's you.

390
00:27:30,144 --> 00:27:34,544
The prizes, yes, righto. We might
as well be shoving along with it.

391
00:27:34,646 --> 00:27:38,546
- What's this one?
- Spelling and dictation, PK Purvis.

392
00:27:38,649 --> 00:27:42,749
Spelling and dictation, PK Purvis.

393
00:27:42,851 --> 00:27:45,951
Forward, PK Purvis.

394
00:27:47,054 --> 00:27:50,154
- Are you PK Purvis?
- Yes, sir.

395
00:27:54,058 --> 00:27:57,558
- lt's a beautiful world, PK Purvis.
- Yes, sir.

396
00:27:57,660 --> 00:28:00,460
Ah, you've noticed it, have you? Good.

397
00:28:01,463 --> 00:28:04,363
- Are you married by any chance?
- No, sir.

398
00:28:04,465 --> 00:28:07,565
Get married, PK Purvis. lt's the only life.

399
00:28:07,667 --> 00:28:09,767
- Yes, sir.
- Good boy.

400
00:28:16,772 --> 00:28:19,272
Right, Headmaster, what's the next one?

401
00:28:19,374 --> 00:28:21,974
GG Simmons, scripture knowledge.

402
00:28:22,075 --> 00:28:26,575
GG Simmons, scripture knowledge.

403
00:28:30,481 --> 00:28:35,881
So you've won the scripture knowledge
prize, have you, GG Simmons?

404
00:28:35,984 --> 00:28:37,884
- Sir, yes, sir.
- Yes.

405
00:28:37,985 --> 00:28:40,885
You look just the sort
of little tick who would.

406
00:28:40,987 --> 00:28:46,487
How are we to know that you came by it
in an open and above-board manner?

407
00:28:46,591 --> 00:28:49,991
l can assure you, Mr Fink-Nottle,
every care was taken

408
00:28:50,093 --> 00:28:52,093
to ensure a correct marking.

409
00:28:52,194 --> 00:28:55,694
lf you say so. All right, GG Simmons,
take your prize.

410
00:28:55,796 --> 00:28:57,996
- Sir, thank you, sir.
- But let me tell you,

411
00:28:58,098 --> 00:29:02,898
there's nothing to go on about in
winning a prize for scripture knowledge.

412
00:29:03,001 --> 00:29:06,501
Bertie Wooster won
a scripture knowledge prize.

413
00:29:06,603 --> 00:29:10,103
But, of course, Bertie frankly cheated.

414
00:29:10,205 --> 00:29:13,305
He succeeded in scrounging
that scripture knowledge prize

415
00:29:13,407 --> 00:29:15,307
over the heads of better men,

416
00:29:15,408 --> 00:29:20,607
by means of some of the rawest
and most brazen swindling methods,

417
00:29:20,611 --> 00:29:24,011
even at a school
where such things were the norm.

418
00:29:24,914 --> 00:29:26,514
Madeline?

419
00:29:28,516 --> 00:29:30,816
Madeline, wh...

420
00:29:38,723 --> 00:29:41,023
Madeline! Madeline!

421
00:29:43,526 --> 00:29:47,126
You'll not be surprised to learn,
Jeeves, that Madeline and Gussie

422
00:29:47,228 --> 00:29:50,728
are no longer engaged after
the fiasco of the prize giving.

423
00:29:50,830 --> 00:29:53,330
- Was there much more after l left?
- No, sir.

424
00:29:53,432 --> 00:29:56,132
Mr Fink-Nottle's
inflamed cerebral condition

425
00:29:56,233 --> 00:29:58,233
brought about an early closure.

426
00:29:58,335 --> 00:30:01,835
He returned to the theme
of Master GG Simmons

427
00:30:01,937 --> 00:30:04,537
and his scripture knowledge prize,

428
00:30:04,638 --> 00:30:08,038
hinting of systematic cheating
on an impressive scale.

429
00:30:08,141 --> 00:30:12,241
He even went so far as to suggest that
Master Simmons is known to the police.

430
00:30:12,343 --> 00:30:14,043
- Oh, golly.
- Yes, sir.

431
00:30:14,144 --> 00:30:16,844
- Not our finest hour, Jeeves.
- No, sir.

432
00:30:16,946 --> 00:30:18,646
(Knocking)

433
00:30:18,747 --> 00:30:21,847
- Door, Jeeves.
- Yes, sir.

434
00:30:22,650 --> 00:30:25,250
That may be Mr Fink-Nottle now.

435
00:30:26,352 --> 00:30:28,652
Oh, it's not you. Hello, Tuppy.

436
00:30:28,753 --> 00:30:30,653
Mr Glossop.

437
00:30:31,955 --> 00:30:33,855
lf you'll excuse me, sir.

438
00:30:35,958 --> 00:30:39,658
You remember what l swore l'd do to
the chap who stole Angela from me?

439
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:43,560
Well, as nearly as l can recall,
you were going to pull him inside out...

440
00:30:43,662 --> 00:30:45,962
And make him swallow himself. Correct.

441
00:30:46,064 --> 00:30:49,664
Well, the programme
holds good for the newt bloke.

442
00:30:49,766 --> 00:30:51,666
The newt bloke? Gussie?

443
00:30:51,767 --> 00:30:53,867
The serpent Fink-Nottle.

444
00:30:53,969 --> 00:30:56,169
But Gussie loves Madeline Bassett.

445
00:30:56,270 --> 00:30:59,670
You can't all love this blasted Bassett.

446
00:30:59,772 --> 00:31:02,072
lt astonishes me
how anybody could love her.

447
00:31:02,174 --> 00:31:04,874
No, Fink-Nottle loves Angela
and she loves him.

448
00:31:04,976 --> 00:31:07,276
Oh, that is absurd.

449
00:31:07,377 --> 00:31:09,277
Absurd, is it?

450
00:31:09,378 --> 00:31:13,878
Well, then, perhaps you'll explain to me
how she happens to be engaged to him.

451
00:31:13,981 --> 00:31:15,881
Engaged?

452
00:31:15,982 --> 00:31:20,382
Tuppy, you could knock me down
with an f. There must be some mistake.

453
00:31:20,485 --> 00:31:24,285
There is.
The snake Fink-Nottle's just made it.

454
00:31:35,194 --> 00:31:37,294
Ah, there you are.

455
00:31:39,197 --> 00:31:41,097
Where are all the staff tonight?

456
00:31:41,198 --> 00:31:45,298
They've gone over to the staff dance
at Kingham Manor.

457
00:31:51,404 --> 00:31:55,204
So it appears that you've gone
and got engaged to the Gussie.

458
00:31:55,306 --> 00:31:57,206
Quite right. We're in love.

459
00:31:57,308 --> 00:31:59,808
(Sighs) Oh, come, now, Angela.

460
00:31:59,909 --> 00:32:03,209
Gussie... Gussie's
a splendid chap in many ways.

461
00:32:03,311 --> 00:32:05,711
lf you've got a sick newt on your hands,

462
00:32:05,813 --> 00:32:08,713
Gussie'll know what to do
till the doctor comes.

463
00:32:08,815 --> 00:32:12,115
Honestly, old thing, you could
fling bricks by the half hour

464
00:32:12,217 --> 00:32:15,717
at England's most densely populated
districts without hitting a girl

465
00:32:15,819 --> 00:32:19,219
willing to become Mrs Fink-Nottle
without a general anaesthetic.

466
00:32:19,321 --> 00:32:23,721
- Well, l thought it would be fun.
- l'm surprised at you, young Angela.

467
00:32:23,824 --> 00:32:26,024
No wonder they say,
''Oh, woman, woman!''

468
00:32:26,125 --> 00:32:29,025
- Who do?
- Well, chaps, mostly.

469
00:32:29,127 --> 00:32:31,127
You know you're potty about Tuppy.

470
00:32:31,229 --> 00:32:34,029
For goodness sake, Bertie,
go away and boil your head.

471
00:32:34,130 --> 00:32:36,830
Now, Angela,
if you'll permit me to observe...

472
00:32:36,932 --> 00:32:38,932
No.

473
00:32:39,934 --> 00:32:43,134
Very well, then. l shall say no more.

474
00:32:47,939 --> 00:32:51,839
Just...tinkety tonk.

475
00:32:54,743 --> 00:32:57,243
(Bertie) <i>Jeeves, du yuu knuw</i>
<i>what's haPPened?</i>

476
00:32:57,345 --> 00:33:01,445
Mr Fink-Nottle has got himself
engaged to my cousin Angela.

477
00:33:01,547 --> 00:33:04,247
Gentlemen who are
discounted by one young lady

478
00:33:04,349 --> 00:33:07,949
are apt to attach themselves
without delay to another, sir.

479
00:33:08,051 --> 00:33:10,851
lt is what is known as a gesture.
My Uncle George...

480
00:33:10,953 --> 00:33:13,153
- Never mind your Uncle George.
- No, sir.

481
00:33:13,254 --> 00:33:16,154
- Save him for the long winter evenings.
- Just as you say.

482
00:33:16,256 --> 00:33:20,256
We'll concentrate on rescuing Gussie.
Go forth and scour the neighbourhood.

483
00:33:20,359 --> 00:33:22,359
l don't think that will be necessary.

484
00:33:22,460 --> 00:33:24,360
Mr Fink-Nottle is here.

485
00:33:24,461 --> 00:33:25,961
(Clears throat)

486
00:33:26,062 --> 00:33:28,662
Mr Fink-Nottle, sir.

487
00:33:28,764 --> 00:33:30,764
(Bertie) Gussie?

488
00:33:33,267 --> 00:33:36,367
- ls that door locked?
- Yes, sir.

489
00:33:40,371 --> 00:33:42,071
Let me in, blast you!

490
00:33:42,172 --> 00:33:43,872
(Banging)

491
00:33:43,973 --> 00:33:47,473
- Open this door!
- (Whimpers) Jeeves, it's him!

492
00:33:48,376 --> 00:33:49,976
What's going on?

493
00:33:50,077 --> 00:33:53,177
Jeeves! Jeeves! (Whimpers)

494
00:33:53,279 --> 00:33:55,378
(Tuppy) Are you in there?

495
00:33:55,380 --> 00:33:57,380
What do you think you're doing?

496
00:33:57,481 --> 00:34:01,481
Listen, if you don't open up, l'm going
to jolly well break this door down!

497
00:34:01,584 --> 00:34:03,384
Wooster! Wooster!

498
00:34:05,386 --> 00:34:07,286
Right!

499
00:34:08,889 --> 00:34:10,789
Why was that door locked?

500
00:34:10,890 --> 00:34:13,190
ls one to have no privacy, Glossop?

501
00:34:13,291 --> 00:34:16,391
l instructed Jeeves
to shut the door because...

502
00:34:16,493 --> 00:34:18,493
l was about to disrobe.

503
00:34:18,594 --> 00:34:20,694
- There, you see?
- Thank you, sir.

504
00:34:20,796 --> 00:34:24,896
- Thank you, Jeeves.
- But l heard his snaky little voice.

505
00:34:24,998 --> 00:34:27,598
l intend to search this room
from end to end.

506
00:34:27,700 --> 00:34:32,100
lf he is here, you'd better say goodbye
to him quickly and order your lilies.

507
00:34:36,806 --> 00:34:38,606
What's in this cupboard?

508
00:34:38,707 --> 00:34:41,807
Just clothes. The usual wardrobe
of an English gentleman.

509
00:34:41,909 --> 00:34:43,809
You're lying.

510
00:34:46,111 --> 00:34:47,711
Ha.

511
00:34:47,812 --> 00:34:51,812
- Ha. Ha...
- (Creaking)

512
00:35:03,822 --> 00:35:05,822
(Both yell)

513
00:35:13,728 --> 00:35:17,628
Jeeves, this is all getting a bit thick.

514
00:35:17,731 --> 00:35:19,431
Yes, sir.

515
00:35:27,137 --> 00:35:29,137
Ah, hello, Aunt Dahlia.

516
00:35:29,238 --> 00:35:31,338
Bertie, get me a drink.

517
00:35:31,439 --> 00:35:34,039
Anything, so long as it's strong.

518
00:35:34,141 --> 00:35:38,141
Approach Bertram along those lines
and you catch him at his best.

519
00:35:38,243 --> 00:35:42,343
- Attila. That's the name. Attila the Hun.
- Eh?

520
00:35:42,446 --> 00:35:46,346
l've been trying to think all through
dinner what it was you reminded me of.

521
00:35:46,448 --> 00:35:48,748
Now, look, after everything l've done...

522
00:35:48,850 --> 00:35:53,950
Angela tells me she's going
to get engaged to this Spink-Bottle.

523
00:35:54,053 --> 00:35:56,653
Well, temporarily, yes.

524
00:35:56,755 --> 00:35:58,755
So there it is.

525
00:35:58,856 --> 00:36:04,156
My only daughter, for whom l had
dreamed of a wonderful golden future

526
00:36:04,259 --> 00:36:07,959
is going to marry
an inebriated newt fancier.

527
00:36:08,062 --> 00:36:12,862
Well, in my heart, l can't but agree that
things are not too ooga at the moment.

528
00:36:13,665 --> 00:36:15,965
- Yes, Jeeves.
- A note for you, sir.

529
00:36:16,067 --> 00:36:19,967
- From whom, Jeeves?
- From Miss Bassett, sir.

530
00:36:20,069 --> 00:36:23,069
What does Madeline Bassett
want to write to me for?

531
00:36:23,171 --> 00:36:25,271
Open the damned thing and see.

532
00:36:31,376 --> 00:36:33,276
Ah!

533
00:36:34,278 --> 00:36:37,378
- Ah!
- Will you stop that?

534
00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:41,080
You don't understand. Madeline Bassett
says she's going to marry me.

535
00:36:41,182 --> 00:36:44,182
Well, l hope it keeps fine for both of you.

536
00:36:46,085 --> 00:36:47,985
l hope you won't take it amiss, sir,

537
00:36:48,086 --> 00:36:52,686
but l've been giving some attention to
the amourtary entanglements at Brinkley.

538
00:36:52,789 --> 00:36:55,889
lt seems to me that drastic measures
may be called for.

539
00:36:55,991 --> 00:36:58,091
Oh, drastic away, Jeeves.

540
00:36:58,192 --> 00:37:01,592
The prospect of being united for life
with a woman who talks about

541
00:37:01,695 --> 00:37:05,095
''little baby bunnies'' fills me
with an unnamed dread.

542
00:37:05,197 --> 00:37:10,197
Supposing, sir, that in the middle of
the night, the fire alarm bell were to ring.

543
00:37:10,300 --> 00:37:13,000
Oh, not the fire alarm thing again,
Jeeves.

544
00:37:13,102 --> 00:37:16,602
Yes, sir. As l see it, sir,
the occupants of the house

545
00:37:16,704 --> 00:37:19,504
would suppose
that a conflagration had broken out.

546
00:37:19,606 --> 00:37:21,606
Possibly, Jeeves. Possibly.

547
00:37:21,707 --> 00:37:24,607
Whereupon, if l'm not mistaken,

548
00:37:24,709 --> 00:37:28,409
Mr Glossop would hasten
to save Miss Angela,

549
00:37:28,511 --> 00:37:34,011
while Mr Fink-Nottle would perform
the same office for Miss Bassett.

550
00:37:34,115 --> 00:37:37,415
This is based on psychology,
is it, Jeeves?

551
00:37:37,517 --> 00:37:41,917
Yes, sir. lt is thought to be the instinct
of everyone upon the alarm of fire

552
00:37:42,019 --> 00:37:44,719
to save the object dearest to them.

553
00:37:44,821 --> 00:37:48,421
There's a danger of seeing Tuppy
coming out with a steak-and-kidney pie,

554
00:37:48,523 --> 00:37:50,123
but resume, Jeeves, resume.

555
00:37:50,224 --> 00:37:52,824
Well, sir, the relations
between the two couples

556
00:37:52,926 --> 00:37:57,026
could scarcely continue distant
after such an occurrence.

557
00:37:57,129 --> 00:37:59,429
Mmm. Well, you may be right.

558
00:37:59,530 --> 00:38:03,030
l just feel there's a great possibility
for a slip-up here, Jeeves.

559
00:38:03,132 --> 00:38:07,032
However, l'm not in a position
to cavil at even a 100-1 shot.

560
00:38:07,135 --> 00:38:09,735
At what hour would you
suggest bonging the bell?

561
00:38:09,837 --> 00:38:13,237
- Not before midnight, sir.
- Shall l bong, or will you?

562
00:38:13,339 --> 00:38:16,539
l think it would be better
coming from you, sir.

563
00:38:43,057 --> 00:38:44,557
(Bell rings)

564
00:38:49,461 --> 00:38:52,461
- No need to panic.
- l'm not, Father.

565
00:38:52,563 --> 00:38:54,063
(All chatter)

566
00:38:54,164 --> 00:38:56,164
l knew l could smell smoke.

567
00:39:11,174 --> 00:39:14,374
- Well, Jeeves?
- Sir?

568
00:39:14,476 --> 00:39:18,076
lt's no good saying ''sir''.
Look around you. See for yourself.

569
00:39:18,178 --> 00:39:20,478
Your scheme has proved a bust.

570
00:39:20,580 --> 00:39:25,480
lt would appear that matters have not
arranged themselves as we anticipated.

571
00:39:25,583 --> 00:39:27,583
We, Jeeves?

572
00:39:27,684 --> 00:39:30,184
As l had anticipated, sir.

573
00:39:30,286 --> 00:39:34,386
l'm not blaming you, Jeeves, but after
this, forgive me if l hurt your feelings...

574
00:39:34,489 --> 00:39:37,589
Certainly, sir. lf you'd pardon me
for interrupting you,

575
00:39:37,690 --> 00:39:41,190
l fancy Mrs Travers is endeavouring
to attract your attention.

576
00:39:41,293 --> 00:39:46,593
Just step this way a moment,
Attila, dear. lf you don't mind.

577
00:39:50,698 --> 00:39:52,798
What ho, Auntie.

578
00:39:53,800 --> 00:39:57,700
Well, Bertie, dear, here we all are.

579
00:39:58,503 --> 00:39:59,903
Well, quite.

580
00:40:00,004 --> 00:40:04,004
lt was you, dear child,
who rang the fire bell, was it not?

581
00:40:04,107 --> 00:40:07,007
Erm... l did sort of ring it, yes.

582
00:40:07,109 --> 00:40:10,209
Any particular reason?
l mean, did you want something,

583
00:40:10,311 --> 00:40:12,211
or was it just a whim?

584
00:40:12,312 --> 00:40:14,212
l thought there was a fire.

585
00:40:14,313 --> 00:40:18,813
What gave you that impression, darling?
Tell Aunty Dahlia.

586
00:40:18,916 --> 00:40:21,816
Well, l thought l saw flames. Erm...

587
00:40:23,018 --> 00:40:27,418
The front door's shut. Somebody must
have shut it behind them and it's locked.

588
00:40:27,521 --> 00:40:29,421
Then try another door.

589
00:40:29,522 --> 00:40:32,622
- They're all locked.
- We could ring the door bell.

590
00:40:32,724 --> 00:40:34,724
Who would you expect
to answer it, dear?

591
00:40:34,826 --> 00:40:38,026
The servants have all gone
to the dance at Kingham

592
00:40:38,128 --> 00:40:42,028
and Mr Seppings no doubt took
the key of the back door with him.

593
00:40:42,130 --> 00:40:45,730
We can't stop out here
all blasted night, blast it.

594
00:40:45,832 --> 00:40:49,532
lf Seppings has taken the back door key,

595
00:40:49,635 --> 00:40:52,335
why doesn't one of us
take one of the cars,

596
00:40:52,436 --> 00:40:54,536
drive over to Kingham
and get it from him?

597
00:40:54,638 --> 00:40:58,838
That's the first sensible suggestion
l've heard all day.

598
00:41:00,641 --> 00:41:02,741
lt's locked!

599
00:41:05,244 --> 00:41:07,144
That's locked, too.

600
00:41:07,245 --> 00:41:10,345
Well, that's absolutely wonderful!

601
00:41:11,148 --> 00:41:12,948
They're all locked.

602
00:41:13,049 --> 00:41:15,349
(Clears throat)

603
00:41:15,451 --> 00:41:18,051
- Did you cough, Jeeves?
- Yes, madam.

604
00:41:18,152 --> 00:41:21,052
ls it influenza or have you got an idea?

605
00:41:21,154 --> 00:41:25,954
Well, forgive me, madam, but it did occur
to me that perhaps one of the gentlemen

606
00:41:26,057 --> 00:41:28,657
might be disposed to bicycle
to Kingham Manor

607
00:41:28,759 --> 00:41:32,259
and procure the back door key
from Mr Seppings.

608
00:41:32,361 --> 00:41:35,861
- Jeeves, you are wonderful.
- Thank you, madam.

609
00:41:35,963 --> 00:41:38,163
Attila!

610
00:41:40,666 --> 00:41:42,666
l haven't ridden for years.

611
00:41:42,767 --> 00:41:46,467
You'll soon get the knack
once you've taken a toss or two.

612
00:41:47,570 --> 00:41:49,570
But it's miles to Kingham.

613
00:41:49,672 --> 00:41:52,672
- Nine miles.
- And nine miles back.

614
00:41:52,773 --> 00:41:54,873
(Aunt Dahlia) And nine miles back.

615
00:41:54,975 --> 00:41:59,075
But it's dark. What if l barge into
something? l'll come a frightful cropper.

616
00:41:59,177 --> 00:42:00,677
Good.

617
00:42:01,879 --> 00:42:04,779
(Sighs) Very well, Aunt, so be it.

618
00:42:19,890 --> 00:42:21,890
(Thunder)

619
00:43:19,627 --> 00:43:21,927
Yes.

620
00:43:22,028 --> 00:43:25,428
Oh, yes, l need to see Mr Seppings.

621
00:43:25,530 --> 00:43:28,230
They're all up at the dance.

622
00:43:28,332 --> 00:43:31,432
Er, yes, it is quite urgent, actually.

623
00:43:31,534 --> 00:43:35,534
l can try and telephone him...

624
00:43:35,637 --> 00:43:37,937
with the telephone.

625
00:43:38,038 --> 00:43:40,638
Er, yes, if you would.

626
00:43:49,045 --> 00:43:50,945
Why, Mr Wooster, sir.

627
00:43:51,046 --> 00:43:54,146
Er, Seppings,
l need the key of the back door.

628
00:43:54,248 --> 00:43:58,848
- Oh... l left it with Mr Jeeves.
- Jeeves?

629
00:43:58,951 --> 00:44:03,051
He said he wanted a walk in the garden
before retiring for the night.

630
00:44:03,154 --> 00:44:06,454
He was going to leave it on
the kitchen windowsill for me.

631
00:44:07,556 --> 00:44:09,456
Mr Wooster!

632
00:44:13,460 --> 00:44:16,060
(Happy Days Are Here Again
plays on a gramophone)

633
00:44:27,168 --> 00:44:29,068
(Laughter and chattering)

634
00:44:29,170 --> 00:44:31,370
(Gramophone continues playing)

635
00:45:10,095 --> 00:45:12,595
(Laughter)

636
00:45:18,700 --> 00:45:22,200
Oh, look, he's back.

637
00:45:22,302 --> 00:45:24,302
(All laugh uproariously)

638
00:45:34,410 --> 00:45:36,510
What on earth is going on, Jeeves?

639
00:45:36,611 --> 00:45:39,811
The house seemed positively awash
with joy and laughter.

640
00:45:39,913 --> 00:45:43,713
- lt's gratifying, isn't it, sir?
- Oh, come, now, Jeeves.

641
00:45:43,815 --> 00:45:47,715
l fear l've not been entirely frank
with you, regarding the fire bell, sir.

642
00:45:47,818 --> 00:45:51,618
l never anticipated that it would of itself
produce the desired results.

643
00:45:51,720 --> 00:45:54,020
l'd intended it merely as a preliminary

644
00:45:54,122 --> 00:45:57,622
to what l might call
the main business of the evening.

645
00:45:57,724 --> 00:45:59,724
You jibber, Jeeves.

646
00:46:01,426 --> 00:46:03,326
Explain yourself.

647
00:46:03,427 --> 00:46:07,527
lt occurred to me that were you, sir, to be
established as the person responsible

648
00:46:07,630 --> 00:46:11,430
for the ladies and gentlemen being
forced to spend the night in the garden,

649
00:46:11,532 --> 00:46:15,532
everybody would take so strong a dislike
to you that in this common antipathy,

650
00:46:15,635 --> 00:46:17,935
they would sooner or later
come together

651
00:46:18,036 --> 00:46:20,236
and such proved to be the case.

652
00:46:20,338 --> 00:46:22,638
After your departure on the bicycle,

653
00:46:22,739 --> 00:46:27,539
the various estranged parties agreed
so heartily in their abuse of you

654
00:46:27,642 --> 00:46:29,542
that the ice was broken.

655
00:46:29,644 --> 00:46:33,444
And when l informed the ladies
and gentlemen that l had found the key,

656
00:46:33,546 --> 00:46:37,946
and it was borne in on them that you
were having that long ride for nothing,

657
00:46:38,049 --> 00:46:41,049
there was a notable lessening of tension.

658
00:46:42,852 --> 00:46:45,052
Oh, there was, was there?

659
00:46:45,153 --> 00:46:48,353
Of course, rain was a bonus.

660
00:46:48,455 --> 00:46:49,855
Of course.

661
00:46:49,956 --> 00:46:54,556
As soon as the storm began,
their animosity vanished completely.

662
00:46:55,659 --> 00:47:01,359
(Clears throat) Mr Glossop and Miss
Angela are once more betrothed, sir.

663
00:47:01,463 --> 00:47:05,763
Oh? And what about Miss Bassett?
Do l still have to marry her?

664
00:47:05,866 --> 00:47:10,966
No, sir. Miss Bassett is once more
safely affianced to Mr Fink-Nottle.

665
00:47:11,069 --> 00:47:15,769
- Phew! Well, praise be, Jeeves.
- lndeed, sir.

666
00:47:15,872 --> 00:47:19,972
Although, forgive me for saying so, your
methods are a little on the rough side.

667
00:47:20,074 --> 00:47:25,574
Well, sir, one cannot make
an omelette without breaking eggs.

668
00:47:25,678 --> 00:47:29,178
l say, an omelette. Erm...

669
00:47:29,280 --> 00:47:32,380
- Do you think you could get me one?
- Certainly, sir.

670
00:47:32,482 --> 00:47:35,182
Perhaps with
a little half bot of something.

671
00:47:35,284 --> 00:47:37,084
Undoubtedly, sir.

672
00:47:37,185 --> 00:47:39,285
Right ho, Jeeves.

673
00:47:39,335 --> 00:47:43,885
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